Is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy right for me? Ask yourself these three questions.

Finding the right therapist is hard. While all ethical therapists aim to help their clients, each therapist’s approach can vary drastically. In my practice, I primarily utilize Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Here is how to tell if it is right for you.

Question #1 Would it bother you if your therapist mostly just listened during the session?

Many excellent therapists will focus on creating a safe environment for you to fully share your thoughts and emotions. If they do their work well, clients will feel comfortable letting go and speaking uninterrupted about a variety of poignant memories. The aim is to bring unconscious thoughts to the surface and examine anything that your mind has repressed (especially from your childhood). This form of therapy can be productive, especially for a client that does not often engage in deeper emotionally sharing. If this feels like what you need, look for a psychoanalytic therapist.

If you are likely to come away from such a session bothered by how little you “got” from the therapist, then it is possible that CBT is a better fit for you. In CBT, the client also gets space in the session to describe, remember, and most importantly, express repressed emotions. However, a skilled CBT therapist will know when emotionally venting is productive and when it is reinforcing a distortion. A CBT therapist will offer reframing tools and ask clients to question their beliefs. A CBT session can be a more even back-and-forth conversation between therapist and client. When necessary, a CBT therapist might interrupt a client to redirect the conversation back to the therapy goals.

Question #2 Are you going to therapy for solace or for change?

When I am mutually interviewing a potential client, I look to understand the primary motivation for therapy. Some clients need comfort from their therapist, not questioning. A client who just lost a loved one and needs support during the grief process is not a good fit for CBT. A client who is adjusting to a move or a recent divorce, likely could benefit from a psychoanalytic approach.

A client who is a good fit for CBT is looking for a therapy experience that will help them enact a concrete change to their thinking patterns. They want therapy to be a stepping stone to reach their mental health goals. These clients are sick and tired of feeling anxious or depressed and they want a practical path forward. CBT clients are looking for tangible coping skills. Occasionally, changes in thinking patterns can give clients the clarity to make big life decisions.

Question #3 Are you able to put in some work outside of session?

CBT works much more effectively if the client is willing to do some reading and the occasional worksheet outside of session. CBT is a learning-based therapy method, so the more hours you put in, the more you get out. While I would serve as your guide into the inner workings of CBT, my hope is for clients to develop their own drive and passion for self-discovery.

In short, CBT therapy is a collaboration for your mental health growth. I work hard and I ask my clients to do so too. When needed, we take a step back and have a more soothing session, but the vast majority of sessions will be challenging. I don’t aim to be your long-term therapist (most CBT therapy relationships last between 8-20 weeks). Rather, I hope to be the right therapist at the right time and to bear witness to your remarkable growth.

Learn about how CBT therapy at South Boulder Counseling can help you here.